Surviving An Alien Invasion

Consider this; there are more stars in the universe than there are grains of sand on every beach on Earth added together, and each star in the sky is a sun, just like ours, most of them with solar systems of their very own. In the infinite number of solar systems it is naive to truly believe that intelligent life doesn't exist somewhere else out there in vastness of the unknown. Have no illusions; the day that aliens land on earth will change everyones lives, forever. It is not a question of if, it is a question of when.


Behold: the modern man's guide to surviving and alien invasion.


1) Find out their intentions

Depending of the general demeanor of the visitor, hostile or friendly, be it a friendly E.T. or cuddly Ewok type creature, drawn to us by curiosity of what wonderous things our blue planet might have to offer, or be it a more dangerous, mindlessly hostile invader, like Ridley Scott's xenomorph or the Independence Day intruders, will ultimately make the decision for you as to how to treat the arrival of these intergalactic beings.

The last thing a man wants to do is to misinterpret a friendly alien signal as a hostile gesture and start a brawl if it can be avoided; the man needs to keep his wits about him when faced with something completely foreign. There is no possible way of telling how a situation like this could go down.

From here on we shall assume the aliens are hostile.

 

2-xenomorph

2) Hide

Let us assume that the aliens are not peaceful. They want Earth all for themselves, but to do that they must first exterminate the vermin that is the human race. Yes you can try and fight them, but lets face it, if they are able to fly from one side of the universe to the other in a spaceship, they are probably more technologically advanced than the modern man, and could zap your pistol with their ray guns before you even had a chance to pull the trigger. If they came here to invade they would have come prepared.

Locate a disused bomb shelter, or better still, make your way to a cave in the middle of nowhere where no soul would think of looking.

It is best to avoid civilization, as this is where the invaders will target most. Here in your fortress of safety, the man is able to remove himself from harm, gather his thoughts and plan his attack strategy.

Ensure that you bring with you enough supplies to last you at least two months, and that you have a radio with you at all times in case of contact from other survivors.

Stormtrooper


3) Take down the mothership

The mothership is the key source of alien power and will need to be taken down. The modern man should be fearless and take to the skies to tackle the mothership head on. The modern man, however, should not be stupid; better to stay behind the main pack and judge the situation. If all of the human pilots are being zapped left, right and centre by the alien's superior technology then it might be time for plan B and who is better to enact such a plan than the modern man?

As seen in Independence Day, you can easily take down an entire fleet of hovering spaceships by simply uploading a handy virus onto the mothership's system, although considering we cant even get PCs and Macs to work together, somehow Earth's technology is compatible with the alien's.

Another option for a quick fix is if you have little experience in computer hacking is to find the alien leader and assassinate him. It will be a stealthy and truly risky mission, but as you know from countless films; if you take out the leader, the empire will crumble. Get your hands on a sniper rifle and find yourself a good hiding place. 

 

Predator_stab_by_mystic_x


4) Plan B

In this scenario, Plan B wisely states, "do not consider this as high treason or a betrayal toward your fellow man; the modern man's intentions are always good." Learn the ways of the alien, build up trust and a way of communicating with the them (providing they don't zap you on sight).

The modern man could do a lot more for the restoration of the human race by cooperating with the enemy, learning their ways, how they live, their technologies etc etc.

The man should learn from their wisdom and most importantly; learn their weaknesses. Like exploiting the weakness of the first Death Star; by simply knowing your enemy's Achilles heel gives you the edge. Use what you learn to your advantage. Exploit it.


5) Coup

Although it may sound like the noise a pigeon makes, we are referring to a military coup. Once the modern man has gained the alien’s trust and all the inside information he needs to defeat the aliens then it is time to betray them. The modern man must be discreet and cunning, recruiting like minded men to help him in exploiting the aliens’ weaknesses. In time the modern man will be ready to lead the patriotic charge against the aliens, finally forcing them back to their homeland... or if he’s unlucky, lead a suicide charge and end up with the epitaph, “Here lies a twat.”

 

 

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